Recent Posts

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Are they brothers?

Why, yes they are!I get asked this question weekly. Occasionally people say it correctly: are they biological brothers? It's the one re-occuring question in our lives surrounding our adoptions. Other than, where are they from? And yes, most people always seemed surprised to hear Oklahoma. I don't quite understand the fascination of whether or not our boys are biologically related. The question doesn't offend me. I think it's people just wanting to understand adoption a little better or maybe just figure out how our family came to be. I'm not exactly sure. But we heard this question twice yesterday and once or twice today. I've lost count. My typical response has normally been "Yes, but there is no biological connection." Because I know that's what they are trying to get at, even if they don't ask the question as perfectly as I would hope. :) But beginning today, my new answer is "yes". Because let's face it, they ARE brothers. We've adopted them both and that makes them brothers. Pair that with the fact that Holden is now 2 1/2 and understands SO MUCH of our conversation. So I don't think a simple yes or no question needs anything more than a yes or no answer from me anymore. Even if the other person might not call my answer "accurate" if they new all of the details. So I'm done politely pleasing others by satisfying their curiosity with the answer that I know they're looking for. Instead I'm giving the answer that's in my heart. Yep, they're brothers. The end.
And since we are on the topic of adoption, today is ORPHAN SUNDAY! If you think God is calling you to adoption or foster care, he probably is. You'll love it. Just do it. :)

11 comments:

The Neaves' said...

Love it!! And such sweet boys they are!

The Skains Family said...

And they are pretty stinkin cute brothers too. They are going to be best friends before long! I really really really admire you as a mother. You are that one mommy that I look up to constantly, and I'm not making this up. You always seem to have it together and just such a good mommy!

everyday graces said...

I think yes is the correct answer! No need to split hairs. Can I just say (on my soapbox) Man, people are nosy!

Melodie said...

I took my shower today at 3pm. I wonder if Kristy still thinks I have it together. Ha!

Kristy said...

I feel exactly the same way! I always talk way too much to people who ask questions and I have also decided that simple answers are best, I Love This Post!

Kelly said...

Have you read Russel Moore's book about adoption? I am blanking on the title right now, but he adopted two boys from Russia and gets this question ALL the time. There is no biological connection between them either but he always answers "YES!!" and leaves it at that--he writes in his book about how this sometimes drives people crazy that he won't elaborate on it but he doesn't care ;) They ARE brothers! Your boys are adorable. :)

Rebekah said...

I know this question is going to get even more interesting for us now that we are adding a bio. child to the mix. My two are bio. brother and sister, so I usually answer yes and say that they are both regular brother and sister and bio. brother and sister. I know the question is going to change once we add a white child to the mix.

Recently, though, I've had a ton of people ask if they are foster kids. Do you get that too?? Everyone has been really nice, but I don't remember being asked that too much before.

adrianne + will said...

You all are such an inspiration to me and my husband. We just received our initial adoption application packet and are filling it out this weekend. We will continue to read your blog for expert resources on someone who has been there and done that!

As we've contemplated how our adoption will play out we're excited about the possibility of helping people who have not adopted understand adoption a little bit better. It's definitely something that the world needs a class on!

Preach on!

SassyIfLady said...

Love it - great photos! We're right there with you!

The Holman Family said...

can NOT believe how big Holden is! So cute!

Breeze said...

So glad God lead me to this blog today! My sons are 3 and 8...look nothing alike, look like their from two different races. My oldest son understand completely that he was adopted and is proud that God has given him a family that loves him (he says that often in prayer). When people ask, he's the first to say. YES! That's MY brother!
Anyway, just wanted to drop a line, thanks for having this blog!